I'm not sure if I'm bored or just growing up, but I've started craving time by myself more and more lately. I am decidedly NOT cut out for the restaurant industry...looking back, the only reason I liked working in a restaurant in high school was because I really liked my coworkers, and other areas of my life were kind of crappy, so comparatively, work wasn't bad. Nowadays, I have other fulfilling areas and so work is just work.

Anyway. Here I am on the dividing line of my past and my future (as Jack Kerouac calls it) and I am not sure whether it's the most comfortable place to be. Application deadlines, and then hearing back from these things...it's a lot of waiting. Teetering on the verge.

Here's the quote: I woke up as the sun was reddening; and that was the one distinct time in my life, the strangest moment of all, when I didn’t know who I was — I was far away from home, haunted and tired with travel, in a cheap hotel room I’d never seen, hearing the hiss of steam outside, and the creak of the old wood of the hotel, and footsteps upstairs, and all the sad sounds, and I looked at the cracked high ceiling and really didn’t know who I was for about fifteen strange seconds. I wasn’t scared; I was just somebody else, some stranger, and my whole life was a haunted life, the life of a ghost. I was halfway across America, at the dividing line between the East of my youth and the West of my future.

I'm sure I've used this quote before...but it's a good one nonetheless and particularly applicable to my situation.