I was looking back on my blog entries from the beginning of 2010. And I remember having such a good feeling about the semester and the year in general. Butterflies, I called it.

This year...I just can't seem to muster that same kind of good anticipation. I hate this huge transition, and the little transition between semesters I'm in right now. I hate this time of year. I hate that I feel like I don't have any daily things to look forward to. I hate not knowing where my place is, and the general feeling of losing it these past few months. I feel like I've lost awareness of myself and the world, like I'm just passing through the days, I can't focus.

But I have to remember that just because I'm feeling cynical about this year doesn't mean it's going to be bad. We gotta stay positive. I'm sure it isn't all going to be good, but I'm also sure that 2011 will have its moments, if I can just get the energy to create them. I've gotta find something.